Self-Sabatoge
I haven’t posted in ages and I’m not sure why I am at this moment.
It’s really sad when the one person holding you back from attaining your goals is you!
I’ve been heavy now since 1993. I have the knowledge and the tools and the desire to change this. I have health issues that Demand that I do this, yet time and time again I fail.
I make excuses even though I’m contradicting those in the back of my mind. I skip the gym using excuses such as, I need to get home and make the kids dinner. ( they are almost 16 and 17 they can do this themselves). I say oh I can’t get to the gym because I need to get home because the kids have church.( they drive themselves). I seem to be using my kids against me!
I’ve realized that this is true in my whole life not just this area. I’ve been offered better jobs and things of this nature but I don’t take them because I find reasons not to. Normally my kids. I don’t want to miss out on their lives by being gone all the time.
I have somehow taken myself out of the game. The question is why am I so afraid to live. By living I mean living with my whole self. Not just part. Why am I afaid of actually accomplishing what I’ve set out to accomplish? What is there to be afraid of? Most people set goals reach them and they are then proud and set new goals. I set goals, go into self-sabatoge mode then wonder why I can’t do it! GO FIGURE!!!
I guess it’s time to set some small goals and learn to allow myself the joy of accomplishing them.
“You cannot run away from weakness; you must some time fight it out or perish; and if that be so, why not now, and where you stand?” - Robert Louis Stevenson
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We all become trapped in our worlds at some point or another… if only life came with a rule book. you see what’s happening, you know whats happening. Put the past aside, dont beat yourself up for the past years - life was what it was. You are here now, & you appear to have decided you want the here now & future to be different. It rarely happens by a click of fingers - you work at it, = guess i’m saying baby steps. Take baby steps - stuff the gym - go for daily 15 min walks - build from there. If i miss a gym workout I still go for a walk = I call that a couch potatoe days. The results all add up, they will for you.
Boy, did you open my mind and steal my thoughts? I too have struggled with self sabatoge. It is the reason I have not been going in the right direction lately. But, I realize I cannot do it alone. I need help. Being here has really helped a lot. Although I go through down times, there’s always someone to pick you back up. When you find yourself staying away from Buddyslim, that usually the time you need it most.
I have been there so many times. Self sabotage got me sooooo big, I was morbidly obese and couldn’t walk a single flight of stairs without feeling as if I was going to suffocate due to lack of oxygen. We are our own worst enemies!
I am here to say though, that you CAN stop doing this to yourself, and you CAN change it all and be the person you really want to be. Don’t be afraid any longer…instead, be courageous in spite of that fear and get started taking care of yourself now. I know it’s hard! But you have to just stop doing it. Stop making excuses for yourself and start loving yourself enough to get healthy.
***hugs***
